i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
