u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
