I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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