Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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