He asked me if I "almost moaned"
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
