I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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