she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
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Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
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By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Sorry about my life...
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
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