so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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