Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
She's the barista slut.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
