i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
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