So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize