I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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