my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Randomize