You're my little dorito
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Randomize