Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize