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You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize
