I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Everyone says I win the strip club
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
