Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Randomize
