Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize