arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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