started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize