We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
I know her cup size but not her name....
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
