The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
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HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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