Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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