He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize
