just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Sext me about skeletons
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
