So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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