Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
