theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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