Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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