real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
