ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
