You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Randomize
