Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
