I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
