Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
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