I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize
