Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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