wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....