Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
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