Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
