All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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