What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
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