absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize
