i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.