The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
your room smells of hookers.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
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My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
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When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?