just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
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