is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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