Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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