Me. At least after what I've been through.
Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
