$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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