This phone does not accept mass texts. Try again.
you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
